I traveled to the Twin Cities to refine my movements, to meet Sr. Antonia, to deepen my practice, and to learn how to follow t’an t’ien (my center) more completely as it leads me through my movements (and my life). Thankfully I’ve begun to accomplish these goals and much more….
Sr. Antonia, Justin Stone’s appointed guide, is a lovely addition to the T’ai Chi Chih community. It’s obvious that she lives what she teaches; participants experienced first-hand the ways in which the depth of Sr. Antonia’s own practice (along with her prayer life, scriptural healing, Dances of Universal Peace, and other practices) allows her to maintain a loving, accepting, compassionate, and playful presence with those she meets.
I emerged from the middle of the woods to travel to the big city for this event and, I admit, I was overwhelmed and over-stimulated by the abundance of activities and the numbers of new people I met. By Friday night my head throbbed ... I was exhausted. The next day I asked fellow teachers and students for aspirin and received much more; Ibuprofin and a qigong healing session yielded immediate benefits.
Due to my headache and tiredness I’d missed Sr. Antonia’s Chinese brush painting session Friday night. When I mentioned my absence the next day, Sister volunteered to teach me one-on-one after lunch.
Chinese brush painting is similar to t’ai chi chih and, I imagine, the reverse is true also. Both practices require practitioners to soften and let go. I focused on relaxing and breathing deeply as I moved the brush along the paper and … it helped! I completed enough bamboo paintings to attend Saturday night’s session and make two of my paintings into cards and one painting into a framed piece of art! That’s a huge accomplishment for me as my artistic abilities are severely limited when it comes to brush and paint, pencil and paper, clay, or other art mediums.
There was much to embrace and experience; finding a new friend in my roommate, rediscovering an old student, reconnecting with other teachers, meeting new students filled with energy and excitement about this wonderful t’ai chi chih practice that we share, watching an incredible movie—twice!—that included an excerpt with Sr. Antonia (On the Road Home: A Spiritual Journey Guided by Remarkable Women), eating healthy food, engaging in wonderful conversations, revisiting old memories….
Another teacher and I—both accredited in October 1996—recounted our final presentations during our 1996 teacher training. These presentations are a personal mix of movement and words that complete the final requirements of the accreditation process. The night before my presentation one of Frances’s and my goats died. I was devastated. When I stepped in front of the group and began to talk about t’ai chi chih, I started to cry.
Afterward our teacher/trainer congratulated me on how well I’d done. It was a perfect demonstration of the power of t’ai chi chih practice, he said, because once I started to move it was obvious how quickly and easily the form brought me back to my center.
The other teacher recalled his own final presentation. His preparation—and the 3x5 index cards he held—helped him begin but, suddenly and unexpectedly, he froze. Total silence. He simply couldn’t go on. A previously accredited teacher stood up, handed him a glass of water and asked, “Honey, do you want a drink?” After several sips he continued his talk without incident.
One of the highlights of this retreat: our final morning practice of the Healing Sounds. Afterwards we positioned five chairs in the center of our circle and offered each other energy as the remaining 24 of us practiced the Healing Sounds repeatedly in order to permit every individual to sit in the center of the circle and draw in the energy of the Chi.
What an incredible experience! Near the end of my “sit” time I felt myself sinking, sinking, sinking. My breath flowed out of my body until I had no desire left to inhale. Then I sensed a cord extending down from my tailbone and into the Earth. It felt as if my fellow practitioners were helping me root more deeply. Subsequently no pain remained in my body; I was clear, calm, at peace.
I feel tremendous gratitude to those in the t'ai chi chih teachers' community who keep this practice alive and who invite the rest of us to continually go deeper. As t'ai chi chih's creator, Justin Stone, reminds us:
T'ai Chi Chih becomes a way of life. It is true that the gentle movements of T'ai Chi Chih form a moving meditation and an exercise of great efficiency--exercising the inner organs and promoting healing--but eventually it goes beyond these and permeates the life-style of the practitioner. We do not all see the same world, which is a reflection of ourselves. With the accumulation of Chi (Vital Force) through T'ai Chi Chih practice, permanent changes in the metabolism and the thinking process take place and renewed energy conditions the whole way of life. Just as the thought conditions the Vital Force, so does the flow of this Chi, this Intrinsic Energy, condition the way of thinking. As these changes occur we get in touch with ourselves and the world we see begins to change....From: Spiritual Odyssey by Justin Stone, p. 23
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